Of feelings and books.
If you are a vivid book reader, you’ll be familiar with the post-book-feelings, especially if it’s one which plays football with your heart (your heart being the ball here. I’m sure you understood that but I am trying to increase the word count, sue me!). And I have read more than a couple of books, if not too many, to be very familiar with this feeling.
• Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Rowling wept when she killed Fred, and so did the entire franchise. I was bummed for three or four days after this book that I couldn’t pick up another book.
• Kite runner - left me in tears in the middle of night; I lost a piece of me to this book that I will never recover.
• Farewell to arms - I needed a break from humanity.
• A man called Ove - this is one of the books that I’ll never read again, the overwhelming feeling is not easy to deal with.
• 11.22.63 - Stephen King has dug a hole in my heart so huge, more than any boy ever has or ever will.
• Green Mile - my most precious and memorable heartbreak I owe to this book.
Given all this, yes I am a huge crier, what has happened to me recently? I read a book after maybe 3ish years. Internet suggested I read Flowers for Algernon and Of Mice and Men - the saddest books ever and guaranteed tear jerkers. Yes, I was taken aback by the book. Yes, I was sad. I felt lost, more than sad. I was lost because, I was searching for a feeling that I expected but failed to be felt. I am not saying the books weren’t good, both great books - too many emotions, yes. But the emotions didn’t even reach the depth of my multi layered heart; they left just as soon as they entered.
Is this it? No more heart breaks? Or was I expecting it too eagerly that I failed to recognize it at the end? Did I build a wall around my heart so strong that nothing can stab it anymore? Has the world made me stronger? Or am I protecting my poor self unknowingly? WHAT IS IT?
One more cup of strong feelings, please? I don’t want to be done just yet.
• Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Rowling wept when she killed Fred, and so did the entire franchise. I was bummed for three or four days after this book that I couldn’t pick up another book.
• Kite runner - left me in tears in the middle of night; I lost a piece of me to this book that I will never recover.
• Farewell to arms - I needed a break from humanity.
• A man called Ove - this is one of the books that I’ll never read again, the overwhelming feeling is not easy to deal with.
• 11.22.63 - Stephen King has dug a hole in my heart so huge, more than any boy ever has or ever will.
• Green Mile - my most precious and memorable heartbreak I owe to this book.
Given all this, yes I am a huge crier, what has happened to me recently? I read a book after maybe 3ish years. Internet suggested I read Flowers for Algernon and Of Mice and Men - the saddest books ever and guaranteed tear jerkers. Yes, I was taken aback by the book. Yes, I was sad. I felt lost, more than sad. I was lost because, I was searching for a feeling that I expected but failed to be felt. I am not saying the books weren’t good, both great books - too many emotions, yes. But the emotions didn’t even reach the depth of my multi layered heart; they left just as soon as they entered.
Is this it? No more heart breaks? Or was I expecting it too eagerly that I failed to recognize it at the end? Did I build a wall around my heart so strong that nothing can stab it anymore? Has the world made me stronger? Or am I protecting my poor self unknowingly? WHAT IS IT?
One more cup of strong feelings, please? I don’t want to be done just yet.
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